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New York 2002
Vanity
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Velcro
I envy the children carelessly playing there in velcroed sneakers
how they run
in all directions
with no direction
no motivation
no destination
no concern for possessions
I envy them
with their wide-eyed expressions
and their pencil cases
someday,
my mother the thief
will lie in a simple box
her ashes will pepper no ocean
or sit silent on any mantel
and I,
will envy the children
and the velcro
that keeps them together.
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we were the quiet ones
... when cigarettes were
three bucks a pack and,
we could skip class
and walk two blocks to buy
a dime bag.
we were excused from our studies
when there was a football game
and, we would sit in the top row
rolling our weed,
and talking about what great artists
we would become.
that was before we knew
how much it hurts to need
so many perfumed bodies,
how sad it is to love
so many women.
we smoked, got high
and wondered who among the virgins
would have us;
who among them would crack the
smoke-filled air with her screams.
we were stones then,
skipping on life, this ocean.
-- I skipped three
-- I skipped three, too -
we didn't compete with one another.
we wore black, mostly
and loved everything that was wrong.
stoned, sitting in the top row,
comparing Kafka to Dostoyevsky.
while everyone else cheered for the team -
we were the quiet ones.
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The Importance of Chess
He is five-years old,
and already knows that the
knight moves in an "L" and
advancing a pawn will get him
his queen back.
He is obsessed with the game,
and begs me to play with him
whenever we are together; which
isn't as often as I would like,
so I always do.
Sometimes I let him win,
and sometimes he just does.
He is fearless, bold
and outspoken.
A little piece of me in
every step he takes;
every word he speaks.
He consistently tugs
at my pride.
Sometimes, I dream that
we are saying goodbye
for the last time and
at that moment when we embrace,
I always wake up crying.
And, every time I take him home,
as I kiss his freckled nose
and mess up his hair;
I remember these dreams and
I always drive home in tears.
Nothing in the world compares to him.
He is my son.
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Epic
I want to write an epic poem on your skin
I will start with the title
at the nape of your neck
continuing
with each stanza
filling evey inch down the centre of you
finishing at the small of your back
Then,
I will shine the light there
and watch as the ink stains the tiny hairs
and runs to every pore
Then,
I will turn you over
you - my page
I will peel you like fresh fruit
devour you as a man, hungry
devours a peach
Then,
when my pen is dry
when I am spent and full of fruit
when the room is littered with rinds
and the linens are smudged
with words in blue
I will start thinking
of my next epic poem.
Jarvis Street Monday Night
Even in this heat the whores are on every corner
Selling their cracks
to buy crack
With bruised arms
they hold their legs up
and cry through the pain
sorrow at the burden of their addiction
Down the street
a man in unmatched socks
walks an invisible dog
Dragging sound of sandals
hangs like humidity
With hands fat and pale
holding the leash
while imagination pisses on the hydrant
Countless figures
poured like coffee out of darkness
shaking empty cups
with tar hands
Characters smudged by cruelty
Their stories will not be written
or made into songs
our children will not hear of them over roast beef on Sunday
Years will erase them
their existence will be forgotten.
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The Kiss
Gustav made her real
surrounded by gold
submissive, and
knelt on a fresh flower bed
wood thrush hair
spotted with stars
the air around her
explodes with shapes and colours
her head, tipped
to welcome and receive
his kiss.
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I see you are growing up
I see you are growing up In three years you will reach the age I was
when I first chipped a tooth
in a playground skirmish
In four years
you will kiss a girl (I hope!)
but, not before
you put worms down her top
The days have passed
like bicycles on the boardwalk
smaller, as they become distant
but still bicycles
Once, you slept on my chest
curled up
your little breaths
painted the room with smiles
your every move a photo
I see you are growing up
into a big brother
man of the house
no longer a baby
I see you are growing up
into a friend
a son to be proud of.
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